Many faces of Dee

So my flight back home from Oberlin was ridiculous. My flight was delayed five flippin' times and I was in a mood. Cause all these white folks really wanted to talk about the reason for Newark aiport "shutting" down was cause of a terrorist attack. I'll be damned if a someone wants to say that...I'm a Jersey bred crazy mofo...and that language is not tolerated. Not only did this big old dude swip my seat so I sat middle (which I can kind of understand....he was a mammoth of sorts), but he kept almost elbowing me in the face. And I say...men as a species are very jumpy...

But as I was flying over Penn., I started to get this unwinding feeling. And not just like when you are on a plane and feel queasy. It was like I was leaving a very valuable, very solid (if there is ever such a thing) part of myself in Oberlin. And I feel that way every time I come home. Like I just revert back into a version of myself that just made everyone happy. Part of me knows that everyone feels this way when they go home, and that I may have even placed myself into a situation as an emotional buffer. I don't know...it's hard to explain really. I just know that the relationships I had at home are not the ones that have kept me sane the way the were suppose to growing up, and I feel like I'm 7, 13, and17 all over again. My sister said to me on the phone in the Cleveland John Hopkins airport that I have a way of letting people'e emotions and psyches run into mine, affecting me drastically. We never got to fully talk about it but it's true. Hence the whole hermit tendancies.

Anyway. It's about 4 days till I leave, and parts of me are very excited, and worried. I'm going to not dwell on it and just focus on relaxing and being home as much as I can for the time being.

Things I realized today:
I miss my guitar. Very much.
My relationships with certain people are....troublesome. But I really missed my sister and LP.
I love the movies Ferngully and The Fifth Element.
I missed my Serta bed and green room. A Whole lot...
Shark Week on Discovery Channel is AMAZING.