needles, tea and other things

so i spent the majority of today knitting in bed watching episodes of Psych. if you've never watched the show on usa network, go do so. and then you can see why i love it. (i once had an "argument" with my sister about who was shawn and who was gus and well..just watch the show.) it has been a bit weird to just "veg out", but considering the past year's events, i think i can do with some down time. granted i can't take too much...you know with that student research and all.

over some much need tea my sister and i had a long conversation about everything last night. from trips we've both taken with diaspora and our strange love and hate for wanting to go back to Bahia, crazy stories, our fears, capoeria. and other things, like me fear of my body finally decided to fail on me with incredible back, hip and knee pain among other joints. i forget that she and i are a lot alike in the way we deal with some things, and how polar we really are. but what was so great about the conversation is that we actually took the time to have it. it was impromptu and natural, and wasn't out of a need to talk about each other's faults. to be honest, it was jut one of those things that made you realize why you were suppose to be siblings in the first place. just because....

waking up in the wrong city

so it's been about a month since my last post.  i've been home for about two and a half weeks, and still feel like i haven't quite settled. i guess the word for it is in transit. i guess that may also explain why writing hasn't quite appealed to me in the last couple of weeks. for me, and hopefully others, writing has been a way of solidifying what is. what there is to say, to feel, to experience, or prevent. and so, as backwards as it is, i haven't wanted to solidify anything. or force myself to relive things but to remember them instead. it keeps hitting me that i am about to start my senior year...which is frightening but exciting. i'm ready to leave oberlin and it's chaos behind and finally just do for me. which shouldn't be conflated to me not wanted to do for a community, it is just that there are things that i feel need to be done for me in a manner best well, for me.

so quick catch up on what has been happening so far:
- i am still doing summer research, though this time i am reading caribbean fiction/fantasy writers. sounds fun right? it is...except i can't compel myself to work which is awful.
- i have been practicing on gaia recently and i missed it. i also have been doing more recording of stuff i do.